It is inconceivable to me that anyone would just plain not like children. They are really quite amusing little creatures, especially if they are someone else’s.
Entertainer and modern philosopher Art Linkletter made a career out of “Kids Say the Darndest Things”.
We were on a trip some years back when a spirited discussion ensued as which radio station would be allowed to entertain the inhabitants of the vehicle. The sole grown male – notice he is not being referred to as an adult – pitched what could be considered a mild tantrum because his choice was not the popular one.
Other than the subject to whom I refer and myself, the other three riders were under the age of ten. The grown man was acting younger than any of them. Muttering something under his breath about the inequity of having to defer to a car full of kids, he had to dodge his bottom lip in order to shift gears. Talk about the biggest kid in the room…
My eight-year-old niece Betsy — now a mother of two — had early developed the reputation for making astute observations. She was also more than willing to share her thoughts at what would, for some, be considered a most inopportune moment.
This easily could have been one of those. I fairly cringed when I heard her pipe up from the back seat:
“It has always been my experience with men that they pitch the biggest fits when they are the most wrong.”
Half-expecting Tantrum: The Sequel to erupt from the other side of the car, I scooted as close to the car door as I could get without falling out should we hit a bump. I wanted to be out of range of the death ray sure to emanate from the driver’s seat.
Instead, Betsy’s comment provoked a stunned silence – and then an explosion of laughter – from The Target.
In one sentence from an eight-year-old, a 35-year-old man had been put in his place far more effectively than if I had launched a barrage of guilt and insults at him. You can bet your bottom dollar that, had I made the same comment, the result would have been 180 degrees in the opposite direction.
Why do you suppose that little girls can put a grown man in his place when a grown woman would be at a complete loss to accomplish the same goal?
It’s simple: Little girls are taught these skills by their mothers.
Exhibit A.: In the movie/play My Fair Lady, the lead male character is confirmed bachelor Professor Henry Higgins. Higgins boasts to his friend Colonel Pickering that “there shall never be a woman in my life.” Higgins claims that women are nothing but a source of strife.
According to Higgins, all women come with “Wagnarian” mothers, a reference to the operas of Venetian composer Richard Wagner. If you’ve ever seen an opera by Wagner, you realize Wagner was known for including female vocalists singing overpowering coloraturas while adorned with cones on their chests and be-horned headpieces.
Higgins is not alone in his observations. Take, for example, today’s modern husband who would spend days on end watching some sporting event on TV while the house goes to you-know-where in a hand basket. If his wife so much as picks up the three days of newspapers on the floor as she looks for the dirty clothes piled underneath, she is labeled a “nag”.
If little daughter comes into the room, though, and asks daddy if he has any dirty shirts he wants Mama to wash, he pauses the action, moves the newspapers, and starts to hand his little precious the shirts. Noticing the shirts on top of four pairs of socks and three pairs of pants are going to be a little much for his little girl, Daddy picks up the clothes and takes them to the laundry for his daughter so she doesn’t have to struggle with all those clothes.
Mission accomplished. Mom knew her husband would take care of the clothes when faced with looking like an insensitive clod in front of his daughter.
As Betsy spoke up from the back seat of the car, I knew she had been in this conversation before. She had learned from the master – her mother. Potential conflict neutralized. Man put in his place.
Girls: 1
Guys: When donkeys fly
Remember that a little child shall lead them. And, girls, remember to make the guys think it was their idea.
Helen Person is a former Winder resident residing in Virginia. You can send comments about this column to haperson.VA@gmail.com
And I don't necessarily agree with #1 up there, but you might not have noticed the equalizing gender roles swirling about your head as you talk up the old disparities.
But you don't seem like someone who would cling obstinately to old ways if presented with overwhelming evidence that things are changing.
Same thing.